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#Hospital – October 5, 2015
Skythix grinds her teeth. "I know there's nothing wrong with that!" She says in a harsh whisper. Her anger was starting to seep through her grief. "They all died doing their job, died for the cause." Her own voice even sounded like she didn't believe herself. She knew that you went into the military expecting to die. If you made it through the other side it was because you were strong enough
and had the spirit of the unit with you. "Then why can't I stop thinking about them?" It wasn't just her old friends that plagued her mind. She had enough bad experiences in hospitals to last more than a life time.
Ilyna frowns, taking a few seconds to respond. "It's difficult, it really is," she says, "but in the end, all we can do is accept it and look ahead... at the things we can affect." She sighs. "Would you blame the people at your side back then if a mission were to be your last?"
Skythix had a feeling this wasn't going to be any different from her therapy sessions and that only made her shiver. "Of course not." She muttered quietly. She was never an emotional person and rarely showed her inner thoughts so the conversation as a whole was making her uncomfortable. "I've already accepted their deaths and use it as a reminder to do better but..." She looked up at Ilyna
and then around herself. "It's when I get into stressful situations where I can't do anything that they come back." She was referring to being stuck in the hospital. "It's why I keep trying to leave the room."
Ilyna glances at the doorway. "I still think you should talk to her about it," she says. "Make her understand your situation, so she can better help you. More sleepless nights isn't going to help, and may even make things worse."
Skythix gripped her hands tightly. If she did any harder she might pierce her palms with her talons. "And what am I supposed to tell her? 'Doctor, I keep having dreams everyday of my old teammates haunting me and being murdered by shadowy figures while I'm in your hospital?' She's going to think I'm insane." She released her fists and wrapped her arms around her torso, not even registering
the fact that Ilyna had her hand on her shoulder. "I'd rather jump out the window than bare being in this hell hole any longer." She muttered softly.
Ilyna sighs. "Tell her what you told me," she says. "There's nothing insane about being at unease while in the hospital, especially when we're less than fighting fit." She pauses for a few seconds before adding, "I've been in here all night before just so a friend could feel safe while she slept."
Skythix slowly turned her head to look at Ilyna. It wasn't that she thought she was being selfish about her own problems but she hadn't bothered to think about the others. Not that it really affected her. "Who were you here for?" She asked.
Ilyna frowns. "Va'ynna," she says. "She was here for a few days after a shootout at the Miner's Respite."
Skythix perks up and looks the asari right in the eyes, making a frown to match hers. "Va'ynna got shot in the Respite?" Her eyes wandered frantically in thought. "That poor girl... No wonder she's always so nervous." Her own tension seemed to ease up slightly as the conversation topic wandered away from herself. She silently wished she had visitors of her own.
Ilyna nods. "And that wasn't the first dangerous incident to take place there," she says, "but the first one where she got hurt."
Skythix let out a quick, rueful laugh but kept the frown on her face. "Well now I just feel bad. Here I am sulking and kicking myself that I'm not even thinking about everyone else." She looked like she had a quick flash of realization on her and looked at Ilyna with an embarrassed smile. "So, uh, how have you been fairing?"
Ilyna takes her hand back. "I'm doing fine," she says, looking over at her own bed, or specifically, the sleeping child. "I wish I could do anything useful for the agency. I get to spend time with Li, though, which is never a bad thing." A small smile shows up.
Skythix adjusted her seat on the bed, following Ilyna's gaze to the sleeping human. "I know what you mean. I thought I'd maybe be more than just a person to hold a gun when I joined RedRock. Guess I shouldn't have expected much from a merc group." She said with a lopsided grin. "When did you adopt her anyway?"
Ilyna ponders the question for a moment. "A few weeks ago," she says. "The plan was to let the authorities take care of all four of them, but when we were at the C-Sec station... she just didn't want to let go off me." She pauses. "I promised her I would come back for her, and I kept that promise."
Skythix tilted her head at the asari, having almost completely forgotten about her own problem. "C-Sec? You were on the Citadel? What were you guys doing there?" She slightly leaned forward as she got interested in the story.
There was a turian among them, which meant the Citadel was the most sensible place for me to give them over to the authorities.
Ilyna frowns. "I wish I could have taken care of all of them," she says, "but they needed help I couldn't provide."
Skythix | "Oh. I suppose that's true." She said, looking between Ilyna and the child. "Must be interesting, taking care of a human yourself. I never even had any siblings. I'm pretty sure my parents stopped trying when they found out I had biotic potential." She had a penitent look to her face.
Ilyna nods. "It'll be a bit difficult out here, I think," she says, "but at least I'm not on my own when I need help."
Skythix was about to say something buy Ilyna's words rang true in her head. Jason had been an ear for her once before and while it didn't totally help, it was something. "Yeah..." She said, running a hand over her short fringe. "Thanks... for talking to me, Ilyna." She still wasn't sure she was going to talk to Halisi but this was at least a little help.
Ilyna smiles. "You're welcome," she says, and pats her shoulder before getting up. "You should get some sleep, though. I can let them know not to disturb you."
Skythix moved back onto her bed when Ilyna pat her and got off her bed. "I don't know if I can sleep but exhaustion will catch up eventually." She moved the sheet back on herself and opened her omni-tool to begin reading. Maybe having something else on her mind will let her get some restful sleep.