By the time any actual washing takes place, the water has mostly gone cold. But that doesn't seem to bother Jessica too much. Despite the exhausting roll on the towels, the washing is far from boring with plenty of breathless, tired kissing, groping, and fondling as the pair wipe down one another's body.
#AbandonedPrefab – February 8, 2019
Jessica has a rarely-seen look of satisfaction on her face as she sits, sprawled out, on the nest of towels, using one of the dry ones from the duffelbag to dry off her legs. A small, content smirk is etched into her features as she occasionally glances Yan Sun's way, bathed in the faint blue glow of the Milky Way. The wind continues to howl outside and a flurry of white covers the small parts of the bedroom window visible through the
boards. The heater is doing a good job of keeping the small room warm, but it's noticeably colder than it was sleeping in the truck's cab. Especially when water is added to the equation. But it's not unbearable.
Yan Sun 's mood seems to be nothing short of excellent, and there's been none but the briefest, playful complaints about the cold water as they washed up. She sits with her knees pulled up a bit, legs close to her body, wrapped on a towel as she works on drying her hair. Judging it's dryish enough she lowers her hands, still clasping the edges of the towel wrapped around her, to her knees, resting her chin on them as she turns to watching
Jessica, a big, tired, thoroughly satisfied grin on her face. A muffled hum of contentment sounds as she tilts her head a little. Her cybernetics are still lit up, looking sharp as ever in contrast to her damp hair which lies haphazardly on her head.
Jessica continues to dry off her legs, gaze dancing between her task and Yan Sun. Finally, she gives an exaggerated sigh as if frustrated, though the smirk betrays her intentions. "What you are looking at? Mmm?" she hums in faux confrontation, extending her leg to give Yan Sun a poke with her foot. Fatigue has made its way into her tone. As usual, she seems entirely unbothered by her lack of clothing. Aggressive and confident nudity
Yan Sun sways a little as Jessica pokes her, a snicker slipping out as she pulls her legs a bit closer to her body to 'escape' further prods. Her gaze darts across Jessica's body before going back to her face. "You...?" she replies quietly, her voice worn and low on energy but filled with affection and happiness none the less. Her grin remains as she continues to watch Jessica in the blue gloom of the projection.
Jessica's gaze darts downwards briefly with a shake of her head, as if focusing on her task when Yan Sun responds. She gives her leg one more pass with the towel before dropping it beside her and leaning back slightly, lazily propping herself up with her elbows against the damp towels beneath her. Her gaze scans over Yan Sun briefly before being pulled to the window when a number of distant noises sound out over top of the blizzard
raging outside. They almost sound like high-pitched 'WHOOP!'s. It causes her to give a small snicker.
Yan Sun blinks, her gaze drawn to the window alongside Jessica's. "...whaaat's that?" she asks uncertainly, shifting a little against the towel she's sitting on and glancing Jessica's way, her grin replaced by confusion and a hint of skittish unease.
Jessica cocks a brow as she looks back to Yan Sun. Her smirk widens. "Carashan." she explains with a shrug, not seeming particularly worried. "Maybe they are angry that we eat their friend, mmm?" she suggest, eye darting briefly towards the pan abandoned on the floor.
Yan Sun quickly gains an unsure frown. "What?" she asks immediately, letting out an uneasy laugh. "They're... not dangerous, right?"
Jessica gives a dismissive shrug of her shoulders, brow furrowed as she grows more interested in picking at a strand of long, dark hair- most certainly not her own- that is clung to her side. "Sometimes." she says. "Why you are thinking of maybe inviting them inside?" she asks. When she finally pulls the hair free, she holds it up as if to show Yan Sun, her concern over the carashan already swept aside. "I think that I pull some of your
Yan Sun seems to decide that if Jessica isn't worried she probably doesn't need to be either, although it takes a conscious effort to not think about whether the wildlife could get inside the cabin. Jessica's comment helps distract her, a small grin crossing her lips as her gaze darts back to her, and then down at the damp towels that cover the floor. "Yeah..." she says quietly, a hint of a blush accompanying her widening grin. "Got pretty
intense..." she muses a bit breathlessly, hand briefly brushing across her throat before grabbing hold of her towel again and wrapping it a bit closer around herself to shield her bare skin from the remaining chill that the heater can't dispel.
Jessica's grin only seems to grow, head tilting to the side as she studies Yan Sun in silence for the moment. As her gaze comes to the red mark painted across Yan Sun's throat, she reaches up to touch her own neck, tracing a line across it with her fingertips. For a brief moment she's set upon by the urge to ask if she's okay, but she's quick to brush that aside. "Dirty slut." she teases instead, a tired snicker accompanying it as she
attempts to give Yan Sun another playful prod with her foot, but just doesn't have the energy- nor the range now that Yan Sun has shifted back- to really commit to it.
Yan Sun lets out a faint snicker of her own, embarrassment growing a little, but she's too tired, and too much still in the aftermath of their pre-wash sidetrack for it to really take hold. When her gaze goes back to Jessica she feels the urge to be closer. To feel the comfort of her body heat and her breath. But it's a soft desire, her other wants sated for the time being, and the affection in her eyes show as much. "How are we-..." She
pulls her gaze away from Jessica, glancing around the room. "...are we sharing a sleeping bag?" she asks hopefully, uncertain of their size and whether they combine, and with no camping experience to help her.
Jessica casts a glance towards the rolled up sleeping bags. It isn't something she had particularly considered, but Yan Sun's suggestion causes her to draw in a tired breath and cock an eyebrow as she watches her, as if assuming ulterior motives. Despite that, she gives an affirmative hum. "I will maybe let you in my sleeping bag tonight." she decides. A snicker follows it shortly and she leans back a bit heavier against her elbows,
attention turning towards what she can see of the window and the flurry of white beyond it, gaze growing a bit distant.
Yan Sun gains a small smile. She follows Jessica's gaze to the window, a shiver running through her body just from seeing the snow, the chill in the air seeming more apparent somehow as soon as her focus shifts to the blizzard outside. She lets her towel drop, lazily reaching over towards the bag with a grunt as she strains to reach, having decided that she'd like to have something else than a damp towel keeping her warm. Of course, she
didn't actually bring any clean clothes from the truck, which is something she quickly realizes, eyebrows furrowing as she slumps a little, propped up on her elbows, upper body still awkwardly stretched across the towels from where she was sitting. She doesn't say anything out loud in the interest of avoiding mockery from Jessica, instead grabbing their sleeping gear. The coziness of crawling into a sleeping bag sounds pretty good
Jessica continues to watch out the window, her mind somewhere else for the moment. Her attention is only diverted once Yan Sun begins to shift about. She observes Yan Sun's lazy attempt at gathering their sleeping gear in amusement, making no attempt to help for the moment. As Yan Sun finally gets ahold of it, she leans back a bit more as she watches her work. But her gaze grows distant once more, absently following Yan Sun's hands with
her eye as she attempts to prepare their gear. "My father would be so disappointed." she eventually muses aloud, seemingly unbothered by the sentiment. As a matter of fact, it's accompanied by a semblance of her earlier grin. Spiteful and proud.
Yan Sun has started unpacking their sleeping gear, rolling out the mat and starting to tug at the sleeping bag when Jessica speaks, drawing her attention over to her. "...what?" she asks, confusion in her expression, clearly caught off-guard by the to-her out of nowhere musing. She stops what she was doing, the sleeping bag in her lap for the moment as she studies Jessica.
Jessica gives a dismissive shrug, seemingly not having considered that Yan Sun might need clarification. "Running from a fight." she explains simply. "Running from my troubles..." she clarifies, causing her gaze to lower slightly and, with it, her grin. But it resurfaces soon enough with a hollow snicker. "He was always a-... a fucking-... gah-..." she struggles as her English fails her. So she finds herself defaulting back to one
she's more familiar with. Not her native language. No, as Yan Sun probably would have noticed by this point, she rarely speaks in her native tongue. She falls back to the language most common to her. The harsh, throaty batarian dialect. "...Hypocrite."
Yan Sun gains a faint frown as she listens. She doesn't seem sure what to say, idly balling up the sleeping bag in her hands as her gaze falls, going silent for a time as she struggles with the weight of the topic. "...you don't think he'd be glad you're safe?" she asks softly, a bit of unease in expression when she looks up at Jessica again, studying her. "...happy?" she ventures, the addition sounding more uncertain, as if it's too
Jessica gives a small snort. Just a huff of air through her nose. A laugh cut short by the lack of humor in the subject matter. Her gaze turns to the sleeping bag in Yan Sun's hands. For a time it doesn't even seem like she's going to answer the question. Just a distant look on her face as she runs the tip of her tongue back and forth across the bottom of her top teeth. "Would yours?" she asks when she finally meets Yan Sun's gaze
Yan Sun meets Jessica's gaze for a time before giving a very faint nod of acknowledgement - as one might expect it's obvious from her face that it's not an answer to the question. There's a part of her that wants to curse Jessica's father out, but the heaviness there is so very different from her own - he's dead, and that keeps her quiet. Instead she starts to lay out the sleeping bag with a sigh, moving pillow and blankets over to fortify
what is sure to be a cozy refuge from the cold. Perhaps having had a moment to think she glances back to Jessica. "Guess we're both disappointments." she offers with a small, soft smile that manages to be both cynical and genuine.
Jessica falls into the silence as Yan Sun begins to move everything over. She turns her head to glance back towards the window and the blizzard roaring beyond when Yan Sun speaks up, once again drawing her attention back. The response seems to hit the right mark, causing a grin to spread out across her face once more. For each time she disappointed her father, there were probably ten examples of the roles being reversed. It doesn't take
a detective to see that Yan Sun's relationship with her father hasn't been too different in that regard. "We are our father's daughters, mmm?" she hums, matching Yan Sun's cynicism with a bit of her own. With a sigh, she shifts to her knees, seemingly deciding that she should probably help Yan Sun set up their sleeping spot, arbitrarily adjusting things that don't really need to be adjusted.
Yan Sun seems to judge their sleeping spot sufficiently comfy, almost immediately retreating into the unzipped sleeping bag, underneath a couple of blankets for extra warmth. "Who cares what they'd think?" she decides. Of course, the answer is they both do, isn't it? But she ignores the part of her brain that chimes in with that, instead holding the bag and blankets open for Jessica - seems she'd rather talk surrounded by insulating sleeping
gear and soft pillows. There doesn't seem to be a thought in her mind that the wet towels need to be taken care of.
Jessica gives a hollow snicker to the sentiment, followed by a hum in affirmation that doesn't have much enthusiasm behind it. She draws in a breath as Yan Sun holds open the sleeping bag, giving a brief glance about at the mess they've made. She's certainly not the tidiest of people, but even she knows that they'll need to soak the towels and hang them to dry if they're going to be able to use them again. But they've also got all night
to worry about that. Right now, the warm invitation is much more enticing offer than bullshit busywork and she quickly crawls in on all fours. The initial shock of cold material against her skin reminds her of just how chilly it actually is in the abandoned structure, hastening her in zipping the bag closed and pressing against Yan Sun for body heat.
Yan Sun is quick to slip her arms around Jessica, pressing up against her and resting her head against her neck, looking up at an angle at the glowing swirl of stars above. Neither of them are all that big, so with a sleeping bag made to fit people of varying sizes sharing isn't much of an issue. Hopefully their bodies will heat up the textiles soon enough. "Much better..." she comments quietly, reaching for one of Jessica's hands.
Jessica brings her left hand- the hand closest to Yan Sun- behind her head, her single brown eye turning towards the ceiling, gaze staring through the stars. Yan Sun's comment causes a slight twitch of her lip, a shadow of a smile briefly making an appearance. Her attention slips back to the woman at her side as she feels Yan Sun take her right hand. There's a look of discomfort for just a moment before it passes and she's turned back
to the ceiling. Even after the past few months together, it still happens from time to time. A knee jerk reaction when she's most conscious of her burns. And it's only during the quiet moments. The soft moments. She can stand before Yan Sun confidently wearing nothing but a smile in the most intimate of moments, but then recoil when it comes to holding hands. When it comes to real intimacy. But she recovers while doing her
best not to draw much attention to it, idly interlocking her fingers with Yan Sun's as she stares upwards. It's probably not too difficult to guess what her mind is on. Who it's on.
Yan Sun gives Jessica's hand a small squeeze, her only acknowledgement that she noticed her brief discomfort. She turns partly onto her back, still pressed up against Jessica, leaning her head against hers briefly as she looks up at the false stars. For a moment she's content to just lie in silence, but Jessica's distant mind is far too obvious, and soon her voice sounds in the dark: "What made you think of your dad?" she asks softly,
Jessica doesn't respond right away. The only sign that she even heard the question is a slightly deeper breath. The truth is, she wasn't. And that was the anomaly. A short period of actual happiness. The rest of the trip- the point of the trip- temporarily forgotten. And then it hit her. Like it always does. Because they're never too far from her thoughts. And the further they are, the more guilt she feels when her thoughts
inevitably drift back to them. That she can feel happiness while they're charred husks rotting in the ground. Because of her. Of course she doesn't acknowledge any of that. Not directly, anyway. Instead, she simply shakes her head against Yan Sun's. She opens her mouth to speak but, instead of words, all that escapes is a frustrated sigh.
Yan Sun shifts beside Jessica, entirely on her side again, a hint of distance between them as she props herself up on the elbow of the arm that was underneath Jessica, looking down at her, searching her face in the dim light of the galaxy above. "Talk to me." she says quietly. It's a gentle request, not a demand, and she waits in silence afterwards, giving her time to form a reply. Her left hand keeps a hold of Jessica's right, resting
Jessica's gaze remains fixed on the ceiling. Through the stars sprawled out across the room. That discomfort returns and she gives a small shake of her head, silence permeating the room. But eventually she breaks it. "He was-..." she begins, already struggling with her words and she pulls in another deep breath. "...He was a fucking asshole." she says, but her delivery is dry. Harsh, even. Decidedly non-humorous despite the snicker that
accompanies it. "I do not think that he makes one honest credit his entire life. He is always lying. And stealing. And cheating behind our mother's back. But she is always forgiving him, mmm? Always." She presses her tongue against the inside of her cheek, poking at it idly as she chews on her thoughts. "Some days I just wish that he would die." Another empty snicker follows. "Me and Martin both. And-..." she trails off, her
Yan Sun frowns as she listens to Jessica's description of her father, listening in silence. The final comment causes her to let out a sigh, her gaze falling away from Jessica for a moment. It's impossible for her not to think about her own parents. And about Jessica's disbelief that she'd never want to see them again. A quiet, empty "Yeah..." is her only response at first, trying and failing to find something to say. Some kind of insight
to give. She doesn't have any. Of course she doesn't. "...and now you wish he was still here." she sighs, after drawing in a long breath. She still hasn't met Jessica's gaze again.
Jessica frowns at the sentiment and, after a few moments, her frown turns to a full-on scowl. "No." she scoffs. "You hear what I say, yes? He is a fucking asshole!" she exclaims, briefly turning her gaze to Yan Sun, having to lift her head slightly to do so. It's a lie and, like many of her lies, it's not a very good one. It's a weak attempt at trying to convince herself moreso than Yan Sun. As if it's the proper reaction after
everything he did. As if she shouldn't miss him. As she sets her head back down, she corrects herself in a mutter, "...was-... a fucking asshole..." The thought seems to visibly dampen her already souring mood. Once again, silence overtakes her as her own thoughts betray her sentiment and she shifts uncomfortably, but remains close to Yan Sun. Eyes bouncing about the Milky Way above. A reminder of just how little she's seen
Yan Sun seems saddened by Jessica's souring mood, any trace of her earlier, practically beaming happiness wiped away. Her gaze has returned to Jessica's face, studying her silently in the dark for a little while, thumb brushing back and forth across the coarse skin of her hand. A heavy sigh slips out and she gives what passes for a shrug in her current position. "I do listen to you, Jessica. And I'm not stupid." She gives her hand a
squeeze, searching her face as she hesitates briefly. "Just because he was an asshole doesn't mean you can't miss him..."
Jessica shifts in place, turning onto her side so that she's face-to-face with Yan Sun beneath the sleeping bag. She mimes Yan Sun's positioning, propping her head up with her left hand, elbow against the pillow, but her gaze doesn't meet Yan Sun's. She looks down into the space between them, little more than blackness given the sleeping bag, the darkness, and their positioning. She loosens her grip on Yan Sun's hand, but doesn't let it
go completely. Idly dragging her fingers back and forth between Yan Sun's as she swims through her thoughts. There's no anger in her expression. For once. Just a somber smile, accepting that Yan Sun isn't going to buy her bullshit. Not that Yan Sun has ever bought her bullshit. Since the very beginning she's seen right through her. Perhaps 'pretend to buy her bullshit for the sake of avoiding a fight' is a better description.
"...I know." she admits softly. A small nod of her head follows and she peers up at Yan Sun through her brow, only briefly meeting her gaze as if afraid of whatever judgement that might be awaiting her admission. "...He-... was a very hard man to love..."
Yan Sun nods faintly, a soft, sympathetic smile briefly crossing her lips. "...but you did anyway..." she continues, practically in a whisper, continuing to study Jessica's face, even when her gaze isn't met. She goes quiet as she catches her restless hand, squeezing it and waiting as she gives her space to talk at her own pace.
Jessica's gaze remains low, fixed on where their hands are even if she can't see them buried beneath the sleeping bag. Her jaw clenches, the discomfort palpable as she tries to explain herself to Yan Sun. To force herself to try to explain herself. Her mouth opens, then closes, giving an almost pained wince in response to her own silence. At her inability to open up to someone who has very quickly grown to be so important to her. Her
inability to show what might be percieved as weakness. "...Is easy to care for a perfect person, mmm?" she finally asks distantly- almost to herself- sidestepping directly responding to Yan Sun's statement. "There is no challenge in caring about someone without a flaw. Is no test. But-... this is not love. Not really." She swallows, taking a moment to consider her words. "Sometimes-..." she stammers, finally forcing herself to
meet Yan Sun's gaze, her usually stoney expression showing the faintest hint of fragility. "Sometimes we must look past all of the shit, yes? And-... sometimes there is much shit. But you-..." her struggle to navigate her own words continues, "...you look between the cracks..." She releases her grip on Yan Sun's hand, bringing hers up between them. She gives a small measurement with her thumb and index finger, peering
between them at Yan Sun for a moment before her hand moves to Yan Sun's side. Her gaze drops once more but she seems to catch it and wills herself to look at Yan Sun. "When you love what is between these cracks, sometimes you must love alllll of the shit on the outside, too... You do not need to be happy about it. Maybe-... maybe they are just a piece of shit." she shrugs, "Maybe you must be a piece of shit, too, for to
loving them... But-... But this is love, I am thinking." she gives a stern nod. A confident nod, as if she's convinced that she's right. "Is-... is being a piece of shit. Together..." She gives a small shrug as her gaze begins to drift lower once again. "...So of course I love him, kitty cat." she admits, as if there was ever any question. Her voice breaks ever so slightly as she adds in a whisper, "He is my father."
Yan Sun listens in somber silence as Jessica speaks, her only reaction a faint, sad snicker at some of her thoughts, little more than a breath let out through her nose. There's a small hint almost of wonder in her eyes at the fact that she's not evading, but it's muted by sympathy. The final words elicit a soft nod, her gaze falling briefly at the apparent obviousness of that statement to Jessica. She swallows as she looks up at her again,
a quiet shadow of a chuckle sounding. "That's-..." she draws in a breath, blinking a few times too many. "That's kind of profound..." she muses quietly, a short-lived flash of humor in the way the corner of her mouth tugs, but that somber expression never leaves her face as she continues to study Jessica. Her now-free hand moves to her neck as she lets out a heavy sigh, her mind swirling with all too many thoughts. Thoughts of
Jessica, and her family. What they mean to her. Her loss. A loss she can't even imagine. Thoughts of herself, and her own family. Bonds severed in life where Jessica kept them after her family's death. Thoughts of what Jessica means to her. Of how much she's come to feel for the person that shines through that coarse surface. There's another echo in the back of her mind too, of Changying. Of years' worth of feelings that aren't
as distant as she'd like. But that echo is easily ignored with so many other thoughts, other feelings filling her head.
Jessica absently runs her fingers back and forth along Yan Sun's side, their scarred, rough texture and dulled sensation a constant reminder of everything that she lost. Yan Sun's comment mostly falls on deaf ears, her mind somewhere else completely. A forced response in the way of a small breath let out through her nose in a failed attempt at a snort. Her mind wanders to the coming day. Something she has to do. Needs do do. Something
she's been dreading since they left. Suddenly, she finds herself overcome with a realization and she meets Yan Sun's gaze once again, her right hand continuing to brush back and forth along Yan Sun's side. "I am glad you are here with me." she says softly, repeating her earlier sentiment. This time it's not followed by any snarky comment or sarcasm. Just the sincerity of a woman desperately trying to hold back her own tide of
Yan Sun gains a very faint, but sincere smile, offering a quiet "Me too." before leaning forward to press a tender kiss against Jessica's forehead, hand still resting softly on her neck. "I-..." A faint exhale as she slowly starts to pull back. "I'm really glad I met you." she settles for, studying her once more with an inescapable, honest affection.
Jessica draws in a breath and releases it in an uncharacteristically soft snicker that seems to help with dispelling a bit of the emotion creeping up on her. Yan Sun's sincerity is a welcome change of focus, allowing her to offload the uncomfortable attention from herself with a dismissive roll of her eyes. She brings her hand up, nudging Yan Sun's head upwards before tracing the knuckle of her index finger along the red marks across
her throat. "Mmm. I bet you are." she teases softly, though there's not much energy behind it. Just a weak attempt at shifting the focus away from her own issues. Her own discomfort. Hide them away.
Yan Sun lets out a quiet, slightly flustered snicker, tempered by the sincerity that never really leaves her face. She catches Jessica's hand in her own, surrounding it and giving it a squeeze. "That does matter..." she admits with surprising seriousness, because the truth is it does. It's hard for her to embrace her sexuality, and Jessica's unapologetic boldness there is oddly meaningful to her. There's a hint of embarrassment in the
smile that flashes briefly across her lips after those words, but it fades upon meeting her gaze again. "...but-... but there's a lot more reasons than that." she says quietly, gaze falling away from Jessica again. Maybe she feels compelled to be honest in turn, or maybe she's just offering Jessica a reprieve.
Jessica watches Yan Sun, the smile that was beginning to form slipping away when she ends up with such a sincere response to a decidedly insincere statement. It throws her off, intercepting whatever snarky remark she's trying to come up with and causing her to scoot even closer, pressing up against Yan Sun once more. She presses their foreheads together, nose nuzzled against Yan Sun's as a gentle kiss finds its way to her lips. Whether
it's the heartfelt result of welcomed honesty, or an attempt at stemming the flow of uncomfortable sincerity is unclear.